Thursday, September 16, 2010

狠心

“怎样才能够看穿面具里的谎话,别让我的真心散得像沙”

谢谢你的狠心,它让我看见了很多东西。

一直以来我都是一个很容易相信别人,很直接的人。

很多时候知道要“狠”一些才好,可是心肠却硬不起来。

不知道为什么,自己竟然想做些改变。

也许,人复杂些才能保护自己?

心肠要狠一点,才不会被伤害?

难道,人一定要带着一顶面具?

从此以后,我不会再让自己在人前将情绪赤裸裸地曝露了。

2 comments:

275c said...

Ohhh.. this is sooooooo wrong. totally and completely wrong. the last line sounds like an angry line. Everybody will wear a mask, regardless of you like it or not. This is to protect themselves. Not everybody is comfortable expressing themselves nakedly, or sincerely, out of the heart to people. And due to this reason, that's what makes u special.
The mask that people are wearing, depends on how much weight or secrets or things that they are trying to hide, can be a burden and are stressful at times, or most of the time.
It requires a set of behavioral and interpersonal skills to make the 'masks' vanish, or at least dilute it.
It's a vicious cycle u see, that will perpetuate itself, today u have been hurt by people because they'r reluctant to put down their masks, and therefore making a vow not to do that particular behavior again. That indirectly means you are going to wear a mask next time. What's the difference of u and them then? you'r going to hurt somebody who's truthful to themselves and others and causing the person to walk the footstep ur gonna walk now. The cycle goes on and on.
Its just sad living a life wearing a mask, of different masks at different times. That's not a life worth living.
Complication will never be able to protect oneself. neither does simplicity. Sometimes we have to read between the lines. sometimes we just have to walk away from it, or the person. Remember if u dont have a mask to protect urself, u must at least have some other equivalent coping/defense mechanism.

Xiang Yuan said...

Hmm.. I will digest what you said. But one thing for sure is that you are right that it's an angry post. I will just need some time out because I am exhausted, that's all.

I do think that compare to a lot of ppl, I am more of a simple and straight forward person- sometimes too simple and straight forward. That's the thing that I wanna change. Sometimes my temper and emotions are exposed too easily. Self control is needed in this case.

Yes I am frustrated and disappointed. Maybe I am expecting people to treat me like how I treat them, and I realised that sometimes i pushed myself a bit too much even though my mind and body are already signaling me to stop.

I just need a good break. Don't treat what I write here too seriously Ivan because a lot of times I write it out of my frustrations or emotions. That may not represent what I really think due to the emotions I have.

Thanks. =)